Dissociated Press


With nothing much better to do, I wrote a Dissociated Press program, which is an implementation of the word-mangling algorithm described at the Jargon File.

Then, when working on an assignment for a module about Law, and simultaneously wondering why on earth this module is compulsory for computer science students, I thought it would probably be more interesting if I piped it through Dissociated Press. Throwing in the blitherances page and the Mike FAQ for good measure, I obtained snippets such as these (which are completely unaltered):

  • Therefore, Mike insisted that he doesn't put his clothes in the middle of the doctor
  • Doctors have a proximate relationship with the culmination of the table.
  • Darth Vader has a high chance of being officially a paying housemate, but not a student.
  • Jon will take their plates, and call them "oatmeal"
  • Throughout the term. I have to ring the answerphone service, navigate through the options, and listen to the Phase of the situation outlined in the bin
  • The third year draws to a lecture, mess about on my mind!
  • Angela might make a claim accusing the doctor of being officially a paying housemate, but not a student.
  • You assume that Mike is in the DCS lab, it's now noon, and I'm going to put in a plural. Ever. Butchers, that applies to you and your bedroom door simultaneously without stretching, it doesn't take a plate, and us three will sit in the house of Lords, in the DCS lab, it's now noon, and I'm going home.
  • From this, we can safely ignore Mike for about a week during which BT sit on their bouncy castle.
  • I walk into Mike's room, his comments included "this is THE majority of your house's crockery and cutlery in your COA assignment?
  • Incidentally, they were all produced with the option -n 2. Some time I might get around to making a web-based version of the Dissociated Press program, but for now it's available as C source.